x-mas eve

Watched Family Guy and had Joey’s pizza…best pizza and best TV I can get in DE. best xmas eve ever??? time will tell…

Haaäääääägen Dazs…

It is snowing little ice chips.

I think I dreamed of a crepe with gnutella in it…dammit now I’m hungry….do’h!

Spent a bit of time last night with all the important people left in frankfurt….

Random Quotes:

,,Midgets are conniving”

,,I reckon midgets innards are just like their head…normal size…”

There was also a rousing discussion about midget tampons….yeah…which reminds of a scene from Family Guy…

it involved a sperm bank and jody fosters fist….ok nevermind…smile and nod…smile and nod…

which also reminds me of another scene from family guy…set up was something like…this is even worse than a conversation between an old guy and a midget…

Old Guy looks at midget

Midget: ,,What’re you looking at?”
Old guy:
,,Well…where’s the rest of ya?”

EMPTY HOUSE

the market is gone…I think I’m probably the last one left in the building again…Last year for 3 straight days the elevator didn’t move except for me. I think I was the only one here…

Nice job 2,0 for inventing facebook politics and then having to cancel your account! Enjoy the states jerk!

That jerk once said he hates americans, but likes what the US stands for…I don’t even know what that means…ask 12 people get 13 answers…

I might be going to Norway and Italy for business first half of next year…should be fun eh?

4th NAD in a row…

When web 2,0 finally rescues us from the hours per week that we spend on ,,research” (finding out about what movies, TV shows, books, art, entertainment, tabloids, papers, etc we feel the need to be told about) will we spend more time thinking or less?

and below is just cuz…I found it online so it must be true right?

The pronunciation of an R at the end of words like “idea” as well as in the middle of expressions like “I saw it” (Australian sounds like “I sawr it”) is, ironically, usually the result of the LOSS of r in certain situations.

It happened something like this:

1) Many British dialects, including the “Received Pronunciation”, stopped pronouncing many r’s, beginning in the 18th century (though seeds of r-loss may go back several centuries). These are called “non-rhotic” (non-r-pronouncing) dialects (as opposed to “rhotic” dialects).

Note that this happened AFTER the founding of the American colonies in the 17th century, which is why most American dialects did not experience this change (except for those, esp.in parts of New England, who maintained closer contacts with Britain and imitated some of the British changes).

2) Now in these non-rhotic dialects, the /r/ is usually lost ONLY at the very end of a phrase, or when it appears before a consonant. But when the sound is followed immediately be a vowel it IS pronounced. In other words, a Bostonian might say “The cah just pulled out”, but “the car is in the street.” This r — which is maintained because it helps one move from one vowel to the others is called a “linking r”

3) By analogy or ‘rule extension,, in other situations where one is transitioning from one vowel to another — as in “I saw it” or “the idea is a good one”– many of these non-rhotic dialects began to insert r’s in the pronunciation that were not there to begin with. This non-original or “intrusive r” is frowned upon in Received Pronuciation, but it still happens.

4) Some dialects carried this further and pronounced the intrusive r in other contexts, so that some words with no final r came ALWAYS to be pronounced with one. “Idear” and “drawring” in various British accents, Australian, etc., are some of the best-known examples.

Now, not all dialects that lose the /r/ have the other changes, and not all who say “idear” speak non-rhotic dialects, but the two most often appear together, by way of the process outlined above.

little folk

I saw pics today of a work function where people were allowed to bring their kids…(I wasn’t there). There were apparently jugglers and a small circus…whoever was taking the pictures thought the reaction of the kids was better than the actual show…

I was going to attempt to make a comment about losing that ability to be amazed, but I know it’s all been said…you really can’t go back can you?

and from Mel who is apparently the only person who really reads this page(with a correction of the spelling of the word the because you spelled it wrong…the…:

Hey Squires
So pleased to see I rate a mention once again on your blog :P  I was explaining the story my best friend from home and she said “of course midgets are funny!  that is why they are in the circus”  – made me laugh all over again! :)  From now on you could insult anyone and as long as it has the word midget in it I will find it funny (pathetic I know)…

out of context quote:
me:
we’ll be like 10 Al Gores…your beard…my glue stick and my herpes…

I’m sure it’s even weird in of context, but to be honest I can’t remember what the context was…I’m sure I was making a point…I often do…It’s just my nature 😉

why is europe scared to stand up to the states…the Europe has a larger economy and more people yet they act like babies whilst deferring to the states…

why does a mac with a 17 inch screen cost 3 times more than a wintel machine with the same screen size?

I saw two midgets in wheelchairs last night…Might have been the highlight of my day… I especially like how Mel was trying to not laugh because I was making fun of people in wheelchairs again…but as soon as she heard the word midget it was immediately funny.

the mass exodus of foreigners going home has started…at least this year there will be no repeat of lucky…

it’s bloody cold outside!

Spent today listening to Nick Cave…Haven’t heard 15 feet of pure white snow for a while (actually I think I only heard it once)…still need to know how many meters that is… Why are they using feet in Australia….Hurry up and change to the metric system please…

So the difference between muslims and christians is that Muslims actually follow their “Holy Book”, whereas Christians seem to ignore the parts about women keeping their heads covered, not having short hair, R2D2, not speaking in church, being submissive to their husbands etc. some muslims actually still follow those rules…Boba Fett…where? I have to at least respect them for that if nothing else…personally I am only in favor of excessively covering women up if they’re chewbacca ugly…. so now that I’ve just defended muslims and called christians hypocrites (except for the Amish) here’s a little something to bring all my muslim readers down a bit…

http://www.joesquires.com/2007/img6.jpg

maybe I’ll get a jihad on my ass….how cool would that be…me and salmand rushdie…

I think I just spelled his name wrong…so from now on I’m going to jst call him salmon rush-D.

I mean to type yoda…I know the difference between yoda and oder…

my english gets worse the longer I stay here…which is funny cuz my deutsch is also getting worse the longer I stay here…

i was accused of speaking italian english today…because of this sentence I put in an email:

I think I crash early tonight…

Ok on closer inspection I guess it’s a little rough, but I can blame all the new words in my head right? Orgasmus…Ostess….

the english degradation thing is apparently not just me…

other non German’s say it happens to them too…funny thing that….

People at the office ask me to proof english mails and letters for them and I usually have to make changes several times because I’m a bit out of practice or something…I used to be such a cunning linguist.

Two Gallants

Two gallants was GREAT last night!!!! I think it pretty much had to be the best show I saw all year. not my most anticipated show, but incredible! Mouseonturm was a decent venue. Kind of an old crowd though…lots of baldness and gray hair…that was weird…also a lot of 20/30 something nerds…Ponytails, large bellies et.al.

the opening band was from Portland (Blitzen trapper) so I spent most of that set yelling “185th and Burnside”…I don’t even know what that means…they all had beards so I actually said the words ,,I wish I had a beard”. It is Nikolaus season after all…

I also saw a kid with airwalks, baggy jeans and flannel…dude…1989 was cool!!!! were you even alive then???

There was one guy dancing so bad that I was actually mocking him…and if I’m making fun of someone’s dancing technique….WOW!!!

Now that I’ve mastered talking about the weather in Deutsch (Das wetter ist schön! oda Das wetter ist schlecht!) I’m just going to move on to politics…can someone please teach me to ask something like “what do you think of the legitimacy of the state of Israel? Then for 2.0 I need to add in a comment about muslims with iPod’s (auf Deutsch).

Alternative saying to learn would be something along the lines of…”The world obviously can’t handle a Western standard of living so as India and China get richer the west needs to get poorer…I think it’s dependant on the United states to start bombing other rich countries (there’s only ever been one country to use a Nuclear weapon during war right?) for the good of humanity…”

Obviously I have no interest in any sort of response or discussion I just want to learn to say something that might irritate people on a more intelligent level than “du bist eine fötze!” (picture ronaldo in a 30 meter puddle).

got my state of Oregon refund check today…thank you gordon smith…the gift that keeps on giving…(I believe it was Gordo that brought back the kicker checks instead of having a credit on thenex t years return). On a related note…has anyone ever tried to cash a check in DE? I’ve never seen anyone use a check here…will they let me deposit it? actually I’ve never seen a deposit slip here either….

I have a package at Deutsch Post…I hope this is from me mum 🙂

not being self aware is a charachter flaw?

is realism a character flaw?

two gallants tonight!!! Mouseonturm….

I just had my first Burger King kids meal in months (had to be August)…what the hell is golden palace?

I’m angry cuz she gave me ketchup without asking if I wanted mayo or ketchup…of course I want mayo…

I got an enterprise car rental spam in spanish today…what’s that about?

what’s with peoples short attention spans…will we look back in 20 years and see Family guy as some kind of catalyst for movies that just show a series of ,,remember that time that we rented a car in Spain and…?”

is noone capable of watching movies, TV, theatre with a story? How long can relationships, series, subscriptions, general interest last when people snap judge within 10 seconds and never have the need to reconsider their initial opinion (no need to reconsider when the next thing is bound to come along before my drink is finished)?

I had grilled cheese sammiches and tomato soup last weekend……………………….. nothing to add…..it’s probably my all time favourite sit inside when it’s raining and feel better food….:)

I just got a call from the Portland office in the states….does this mean I should have a blackberry…I just had to call the states for almost 5 minutes on my own dime…am I going to get that money back…NO!!! doesn’t matter…I did get to share the joy of gluhwein with a colleague that’s married to a former Hessish (ess)…it was good….the legend of gluhwein had grown with him because in his story it apparently had herbs and orange spices added…I said no….it’s just heated red wine 😉

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